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Do you know that self-care is one of the biggest keys to showing up as your best self in life, and in motherhood? In this article, we will take you through 5 simple self-care practices for busy moms.  When you’re a busy mom, it’s easy to prioritize everything and everyone BUT yourself with so much on your plate.  According to the American Institute of Stress, 73% of the population reported that stress affects their mental health. Failing to make time for you is the quickest way to burn out. That’s why it’s important to practice self-care daily. To some it may sound selfish, but there’s more to self-care than spa days and “treating yourself.” I know that mom-guilt can kick in when partaking in activities that exclude the kids, the spouse, or the family as a whole, but I challenge you to throw that out the window while doing anything that relates to self-care. You deserve time to yourself regularly, and you shouldn’t feel bad for it. "THERE’S MORE TO SELF-CARE THAN SPA DAYS AND “TREATING YOURSELF" Johnae De Felicis The whole purpose of self-care is to help you achieve balance in your day-to-day life. Practicing it consistently can result in the ultimate level of happiness, healthiness, and inner confidence. It also gives you the stamina needed to be fully present in every aspect of your life.  You can have it all–the career, the children, and the happy marriage. How you balance it all is by navigating life with intention and tending to your health needs holistically. The way to accomplish this is by constantly doing things that benefit your mind, body, and spirit. You can’t keep running without the routine “battery recharge.” If you feel that you’ve neglected your needs for far too long, it’s time to change that once and for all. Self-care takes effort, but practice makes perfect. Keep reading on for simple ideas you can add to your self-care routine. Relaxation is an integral part of self-care Simple as that. Everyone has their own way of relaxing. For you, that could mean curling up to a good book, having a movie or binge night, or just chilling in your own little corner. Find what works for you and go with it.  When you need help winding down, nothing says “relaxation” like Verima’s lavender essential oils. Lavender is known for its calming effect on people. Do Yoga There are two types of moms in this world: fitness junkies and those who barely have room in their schedules to work out.  Regardless of which category you fit into, you have to admit that yoga is worth the money and the hype. Yoga is the perfect exercise for people who prefer non-strenuous workout. Even if hardcore fitness is your jam, yoga is the activity you  resort to when your body needs a pause from the intensive training. The benefits of yoga are endless. It not only improves your energy, sleep quality, and heart health, but it can also curb anxiety, alleviate depression, and decrease your stress levels.  You can practice yoga at a studio or in the comfort of your own home. Most people like to attend classes to take cues from an instructor.  If you prefer DIY workouts, the internet is a good source for discovering yoga stretches you can try on your own.  Yoga and aromatherapy are also the best duo for an optimal workout. The next time you hit the mat, we highly recommend that you fill the room with Verima’s blueberry essential oils. Infused with hemp and coconut, this blend has what it takes to boost your heart health even more. Have an At-Home Spa Night When it comes to the 5 simple self-care practices for busy moms, pampering time is a non-negotiable. You owe it to yourself to dedicate an evening out of your week just for that.  When you have those crazy hectic weeks where it feels like you barely have your head above water, an all-inclusive spa night can be the thing you look forward to during your down time. You can start the evening with a nice, hot bubble bath. It’s an ideal way to relax your mind after a hard day’s work.    Use our citrus trio lotion to support your daily self-care practices   You could set the mood by lighting a few candles, dimming the lights, and playing relaxing music while you soak. Moisturize with Verima’s citrus trio lotion to experience the soothing properties of CBD. If your spouse is available to give you a massage, don’t be afraid to ask! Massage therapy can not only reduce muscle pain and improve circulation, but it can also bump up the romance at home. As an alternative, you can hire a massage therapist for the hour. Most will come to your home.  Verima Pain Relief Salve for Massage While working out the kinks, they can apply Verima’s pain relief salve and acupressure roller for topical relief. Fill the room with Verima’s peppermint essential oils to aid with blood flow and keep your skin feeling rejuvenated.  Your skin should have a radiant glow once you’re done with the bubble bath and massage. If you want glowing skin from head to toe, you can end the night with a good facial.   Breathe You’d be surprised by the health benefits of taking deep breaths throughout the day. We could sit and talk about it for hours, but the benefits range from pain relief to reduced stress.  You can easily forget to do this as you’re powering through your daily agenda. It’s an essential part of the 5 simple self-care practices for busy moms. Just schedule time in your calendar to avoid that from happening. While doing your breathwork, inhaling Verima’s lemon essential oils can aid with digestion and strengthening your immune system.  Meditatation can revitalize your daily self-care routine Meditation is another effective method for lowering stress, centering yourself mentally, and balancing your emotional well-being.  It’s best to meditate in the mornings when you first wake up, but you don’t have to limit yourself to this time constraint.  Do it when your schedule allows. While you’re in meditation mode, you can further your focus and concentration with Verima’s calming oil. Ready to invest the time needed for daily self-care? Download our printable checklist so you can tack it to your wall as a reminder!  I hope these 5 simple self-care practices for busy moms helps you get back on the path to balance in your day-to -day.

Share with us @tryverima or comment below about your journey with an autoimmune condition Pediatric autoimmune disorders are on the rise here in the US as well as around the globe. In our son’s case, we saw the debilitating symptoms take hold of his life seemingly overnight. The motor tics, the sleep disturbances, the OCD, angry outbursts, school refusal and the anxiety became a part of our everyday life.  After misdiagnosis, tests and more tests, it was (no surprises here) my mom network that pointed me in the right direction to Dr. Trifiletti a pediatric neurologist in NJ. Our son was diagnosed with PANS/PANDAS and though at that time, the path was murky at best, I was relieved to have a diagnosis and a treatment plan.  Even after a diagnosis, PANS was still relatively new in 2012 and I had to endure pediatricians, neurologists, developmental psychologists, specialists and even the school tell me they “didn’t believe PANDAS was a real diagnosis”. Admittedly, I myself had never even heard of PANS/PANDAs (Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated with the Streptococcal Infections), and I too was initially skeptical, but my son presented with the “typical” streptococcal diagnosis which meant that the blood test revealed high strep antibodies months after a confirmed strep exposure and within days of antibiotics and Advil (anti-inflammatory) as quickly as it appeared, the OCD just vanished.  I was a believer. My son went into remission, but I knew any exposure to strep (which is extremely prevalent in school aged children) could send him back into a downward spiral.  Our move to California tasked me with the mission to find him a new medical team.  I knew all of 2 people living in California at the time, so I joined an online moms group and once again the moms pulled through and identified Dr. Elisa Song as the pediatrician to have for kids with PANS/PANDAS. I can not emphasize enough the importance of finding a supportive pediatrician who is knowledgeable about your child’s condition.  I hear way too many stories of desperate moms trying to find answers and then having to educate or convince their pediatricians of what the problem is.  We’ve had several flares since then, but Dr. Song is always prepared to execute a treatment plan for him and together we are able to get the flares under control.  His strep antibody levels consistently remained high, so after 4 years when he was in the third grade, we had his distinctly enlarged tonsils and adenoids removed.  This reduced the overall number of flares, but not the intensity of them.  During one particularly taxing flare, I read about CBD on a post in my (where else) mom’s group.  I asked Dr. Song about it and she said she had several patients on the oil and the children were benefitting from its powerful anti-inflammatory effects.  I delved into researching the right product that day and wow, was I overwhelmed. It took months of research, trial and error, and many dollars wasted before I honed in on why I didn’t want to use full-spectrum CBD (contains some THC) but CBD isolate was not effective for my son. Additional questions were how could I trust which companies guaranteed that what they said they were selling me was indeed in the container and how could I ensure the safety of the product?   I saw the opportunity to create a brand where quality, transparency and education could come together so consumers know exactly what they are getting.  I would never sell anything I wouldn’t buy myself, so with every step in the journey, I considered what decision-making points were important to me.  Organically grown hemp from Oregon, Colorado and Kentucky.  Hemp is an amazing plant in that it will absorb heavy metals through its roots and actually leave the soil cleaner than before; which is great for the planet, but not so great if you want to consume the flower and leaves. Our farmers know the history of their land and carefully cultivate our hemp organically.  Broad Spectrum CBD. Hemp has approximately 113 different cannabinoids in it which work synergistically together in what we in the industry call the entourage effect.  Hemp has small amounts of naturally occurring THC which is the cannabinoid in marijuana responsible for producing the “high”. Simply extracting CBD from the hemp would give you Full-spectrum CBD. However, I didn’t feel comfortable using a product everyday that had THC in it for either myself nor for my son.  We take an extra step to remove the THC hence leaving us with Broad Spectrum CBD which still has the benefits of the entourage effect.  Many companies use CBD isolate because it is odorless, tasteless, inexpensive and easy to mix into products.  Please know, the products with isolate gave zero relief to either me or my son. Tested for both safety and for content.  We third party test our CBD at three different points during the formulation process.  We test for heavy metals and microbial levels, and we also test to make sure that all of our products have the amount of CBD we promise on the label.  Inside each box, there is a card with a QR code.  We encourage our consumers to scan the code with their phone, and they will be taken to their product batch’s lab results. No garbage. Our original tincture uses only Broad Spectrum CBD and fractionated coconut oil.  Fractionated refers to the process which removes the long-train fatty acids from the oil, leaving only the medium chain triglyceride.  This is beneficial because it keeps the oil in liquid form even in cooler temps and also removes the coconut taste and smell.  The MCT oil then acts as a carrier oil allowing for high absorption into our bloodstream. Paraben, fragrance, dye, gluten, sugar, cruelty FREE.  ALL of our products are free of these harmful ingredients.  We use essential oils to give our topicals a pleasant aromatic experience. Minimal plastic.  I tried to minimize the amount of plastic that came in contact with our products.  This means glass jars and glass droppers. Giving Back. Please know, that we are a privately-owned, mom founded business.  We also want to give back to our community.  A percentage of all purchases will be donated back to PANS/PANDAS research and support.  I recently read a staggering statistic that parents with a child diagnosed with PANS/PANDAS have a divorce rate of 80%.  Honestly, it doesn’t surprise me.  Hear me out please in a judgment-free zone. When my PANDAS child is sick in bed listless and weak, my heart automatically feels empathetic and sympathetic towards my child.  But when that same child is having a flare, screaming through the night with sleep disturbances, having outbursts and fits throughout the day, and constantly moving due to the motor-tics and OCD, even though my rational brain knows he isn’t doing it on purpose, hour after hour, day after day for weeks at a time (and for some parents, months or years), the empathy can run dry and my primal brain kicks in and responds in ways I wish it didn’t.  I have gotten very good at separating the behavior from the child, but even after 7 years of practice, I still fall short.  And when parents are sleep deprived and running on empty, there is little left to give to anyone else.  I urge all PANS parents to seek support.  Start with an excellent PANS/PANDAS support group.  There are quite a few on Facebook, and it will bring you to tears when you have found your people.  They will help you know what to look for in order to assemble an excellent medical team for your child, and the hive’s wisdom and experience will help you along your journey.  If nothing else, you will not feel so alone.  CBD is not a miracle pill.  It doesn’t cure PANS, it doesn’t miraculously give you your child back.  But it is a powerful anti-inflammatory and used in conjunction with our pediatrician’s protocol, it helps my child enormously.  When he is mid-flare, it helps him sleep at night.  I use our pain relief salve which we formulated with a Stanford physician to massage into his neck and shoulders at night. When the anxiety builds, the tincture calms him just enough to take the edge off.  And as any mom of a PANS/PANDAS kid knows, every little bit counts.  Just some good nights of sleep (for the both of us) can be the difference between a day spent at each other’s throats vs. a day where our reserves are full enough to cope with what PANS will throw at us.  Don’t forget the self care.  We do so much for our children and for our families.  But we have to remember that if we are not taking care of our own emotional and physical well-being, then we are not able to be our best for our families.  As a former ballet dancer, I still take class for both the exercise and the mental stimulation.  When plantar fasciitis in both feet sidelined me, I entered a downward spiral of not sleeping well at night, having less energy, thus eating more sugar, which contributed to weight gain and even greater drop in energy levels.  Weight gain then led to even more pain in the feet as well as a drop in confidence levels. On and on it continues and you can see how the spiral pulls you lower and lower.  After months of pain, I started massaging CBD into my feet, and after a few weeks, I could walk painlessly again, which allowed me to slowly return back to dance.  Again, it wasn’t a miracle drug, but rather brought down the inflammation enough to turn the tide so I could then do the physical therapy and eventually return to the studio.  Many of my moms also use the CBD to alleviate their anxiety/stress levels and/or aid with sleeplessness.  A good night’s sleep, an exercise class, art, music, whatever feeds your soul is vital for all moms, but especially PANS/PANDAS moms.  Because this is not a short, acute illness that you fight and win.  No, this is a marathon that requires vigilance and endurance and we need to be our best selves if we’re going to be the mama our kids need.   Verima was started to help overwhelmed moms and their families be their best selves.  Our story is personal and I set out to help other moms and to give back to our community.  Please reach out to me if you have any questions, comments or concerns.  I would love to hear back from you about your journey with an autoimmune disease in your family.  @tryverima.com

Share with us @tryverima or comment below how you are coping post-partum during the pandemic.  Having a baby is a wonderfully exciting time, and parents revel in the joy of meeting their littleone for the first time. It can also be a stressful time, as mothers try to recover from labor, adaptto all the changing hormones in their body, get used to caring for this tiny new human, andlearn to manage their days on very little sleep. It is often a time of very mixed emotions, and attimes, parents (and mothers especially) can experience feelings of anxiety, stress, depression,and more. Throw into the mix a global pandemic, which is forcing many new parents tonavigate this new journey on their own, and the feelings of stress and anxiety can beexacerbated ten-fold. How are new moms coping these days amidst this pandemic? Studies show that the rate ofpostpartum anxiety and depression are on the rise, and that really does not come as muchsurprise, considering mental health in general has been a concern throughout this challengingtime. Where doctors typically saw approximately 13 – 15% of women developing postpartumdepression, these days that figure is sitting closer to 21%, which is alarming. Now, there are some wonderful stories out there of parents enjoying the increased time athome during the pandemic, and families benefitting from the change in lifestyle. My brotherand his wife are one such couple, as they recently brought their first child into the world. Whilethe actual labor and delivery was stressful, not knowing whether my brother would be allowedinto the delivery room and what safety protocols they would have to take, once my sweet littlenephew was born and they were home, their little bubble closed and they were safe and snugat home. My brother was able to work from home, and the two new parents benefittedimmensely from the increased time together at home bonding with their sweet little babe.Being self-employed, the pandemic actually gave them the maternity leave my sister-in-lawwould not have had otherwise. Despite the stress, uncertainty, and worry cause by thepandemic, this is one family that was able to see a silver lining through it all. Unfortunately,however, they are a small minority who have been lucky enough to experience such a positiveoutcome of having a baby during this global pandemic. Many mothers are struggling with thestress and uncertainty of being a new mom, without the support they would normally have,due to social distancing restrictions and such. So, what are some things they can do to help lessen the burden and feelings of isolation duringthis time? We at Verima went in search of some simple but helpful things new moms can do tohelp make this time a little easier. Stay Connected Being a new mother is isolating at the best of times; you’re tied to the baby’s sleep schedule,you’re exhausted, and you’re desperately trying to learn the ropes of being a new parent. Being a new mother amidst a global pandemic causes increased feelings of isolation, as your access toadditional support from friends and family is limited to almost nothing. There are ways to stay connected though, and this is so important. Call and Facetime family members when you can;not only would they love to see the precious new addition, but the support (even if it’s justvirtual) can really help to boost your mood as well. If it is possible, plan a socially-distanced visitwhere friends or family members can visit outdoors and from a distance. Whatever way thatyou can, work in some times to connect, especially if you are feeling depressed, anxious, orvulnerable. Don’t ever hesitate to reach out for support and connection when needed. Get out there!This time in your life is exhausting, and you may not necessarily feel like getting out andsocializing, but it can honestly do a world of good for your mental health. Try to join a localmoms group, even just a digital one on social media, and put out a *personal ad* of sortslooking for other moms of similar aged babies for walks outside, meets in the park or evenwine/cocktail time via Zoom after babies are asleep. However you can, and whenever you can,try to socialize with other moms, because if anyone understands how completelyoverwhelming, wonderful, and stressful this whole journey is, it’s another mom! Make Self-care a PriorityThis is often something that seems like a cliché almost, because it often feels like there is simplyno time for self-care. Not only that, but self-care is more than just a bubble bath every fewdays. Self-care involves carving out time every day to do something that feeds your soul andrenews your energy, and that in itself can often be challenging to do. But, if you can manage it,have your significant other, a babysitter, or a family member step in and help you slip away fora bit each day to have some time on your own. This, of course, is incredibly challenging duringthis pandemic, but if there is anyone that you can call on who can come in to relieve you a bit,take advantage of that. Making yourself, your physical well-being, and your mental health apriority is so important during these challenging times, especially when you’re in charge ofraising a little baby. It is not selfish to do so, it is crucial. Be Active When PossibleEven if it is simply getting outside for a walk with your baby, fitting in some physical activity canhelp to lessen feelings of anxiety, depression, and isolation. By being active, we get our bloodpumping and our body releases that feel-good hormone serotonin, which helps to improve ouroverall mood. Getting outside also helps us to feel less isolated; we may not be interacting withpeople while we’re out walking, but just seeing others out and about can remind us that thereis still a world out there, and we are still a part of that world. So, bundle up your baby, and getout for a walk every day if possible! Limit How Much Social Media & News You Access It is important to stay on top of world events, but if you are finding that it is interfering withyour overall mental health, then try to limit how much you tune into, as well as how muchsocial media you access. Fear mongering is everywhere, and it is incredibly unhealthy. Yes, thispandemic is stressful and it is very serious. It does not, however, need to take over our livescompletely. Limit your access to social media and news, especially if you find that it is causingyou to feel increasingly worried and stressed. Share the ResponsibilitiesYou can’t do it all, Mom! Although it is completely normal that you would want to do it all. Asmothers, we tend to want to manage all of the things necessary when looking after ourprecious babes. But, you won’t be any good to anyone if you’re exhausted and burnt out. Sharethe responsibilities with whoever you can – your partner, a family member, even a babysitter.Call in some help when you need it, and do not feel an ounce of guilt about it! Being a newmom is overwhelming and stressful, and it is important that you do not try to manage it all onyour own. Sleep When You CanThis was always something that annoyed me as a new mom – people telling me to “sleep whenthe baby sleeps”! How can I do that?! Are they going to do the 5 loads of laundry that needwashing? Are they going to wash the baby bottles so there are clean ones for bedtime? No,they aren’t. But do you know what else? It is not the end of the world if the loads of laundrywait a while longer, and you can wash just one bottle for bedtime. Rest is so important, andagain, if you are burnt out and exhausted, you will be unable to keep up that frenetic pace forvery long. Rest when you can, even if you split your baby’s nap time in half – half of the timeyou rest, half of the time you get one chore done. But, squeeze in moments to rest and unwindas often as you can. Tag us @tryverima.com and tell us what suggestions work for you. 

BECOME A VERIMA WHOLESALE PARTNER VERIMA offers a unique opportunity for large and small retailers, organizations, and wholesalers to engage customers and clients in the VERIMA Wellness Movement for Women. The VERIMA WHOLESALE PARTNERSHIP PROGRAM is designed to raise awareness and provide more women access to all-natural broad spectrum CBD formulated wellness products.  REQUIREMENTS Have a thriving retail or wholesale business with shared values and purpose. Retailers agree to sell VERIMA products at the full retail price published on tryverima.com. No markups or discounts with the exception of periodic sales. Display VERIMA items well and use digital images from VERIMA on all web store platforms. Only use VERIMA published print and digital materials for sales and marketing purposes.  Submit Your RegistrationSend a partner request to be reviewed by the VERIMA wholesale team. This account will discounted privileges to the entire VERIMA line through the online wholesale store.Click Here to Register DISCOUNT Wholesale Partners receive a significant discount on the complete VERIMA line and free shipping* on orders over $500. Your discount level will be discussed directly with you. After you are approved, you will receive an email inviting you to complete your account setup.  All orders are placed through web store and require full payment at check out. *Please note that the discount you receive will only be applicable to the items that are the full retail price. When VERIMA runs a sale, wholesale partners are not eligible for these discounts. Pain Relief Salve is the #1 Product in the Verima line @Emma_Gol fashion diva loves Verima products We are grateful for all those who choose to partner with us to educate consumers about the benefits of VERIMA all-natural wellness products. Please send all questions and inquiries to contact@madefree.co *Free shipping for United States locations only. Standard shipping rates apply for orders outside the U.S. Submit Your RegistrationSend a partner request to be reviewed by the VERIMA wholesale team. This account will discounted privileges to the entire VERIMA line through the online wholesale store.Click Here to Register

Share with us @tryverima or comment below fun ways your family is staying fit!  Zoom physical education is not the same, and seeing our kids apathetically jog in place in front of the computer can be disheartening.  According to the CDC, children between the ages of 6 to 17 should be exercising for 60 minutes per day, and we’re lucky if they get half of that.  I see this especially with my middle-schooler who deems himself too old to play on the playground, yet sports are cancelled and he doesn’t even have to get up to get to school or change classes.  The temptation during a break is to lounge on the sofa with a phone or tablet.  This sedentary behavior can negatively impact our children’s physical and mental health, which may be a factor in why depression in adolescents may be on the rise.  #jumprope The science shows the importance of moving, with active physical exercise tied to mental health. It’s difficult for parents who are juggling careers, childcare, school and meals to then get the kids to exercise more.  One fun and inexpensive solution for our family has been jumping roping.  For $10 or less, you can get a simple jump rope, and it’s all you need.  Sometimes we even do a hundred jumps without the actual rope to get the blood pumping before we sit for the next Zoom meet, or meal. Jumping is fun for our kids, and something they can do together (vs. running/biking where 3 different ages make for very different speeds) and they don’t realize that they are exercising and getting their heart rates up.  Jumping rope is very effective since all of the major muscle groups are moving at the same time.  According to WebMD, you can burn some serious calories, and you’d have to run an eight-minute mile to work off more calories than you’d burn jumping rope.  “It’s certainly good for the heart,” says Peter Schulman, MD, associate professor, Cardiology/Pulmonary Medicine, University of Connecticut Health Center in Farmington. “It strengthens the upper and lower body and burns a lot of calories in a short time.”     Building Bone Density 2015 research published from Brigham Young University shows one exercise offers greater benefit to bone density than to others and that is jumping.  Additionally, a 2017 study published in the Public Library of Science found that girls aged 11 to 14 who participated in weekly jump roping had higher bone density than those who did not jump rope. Jumping rope stresses the bones in the lower extremities with impact and the body responds by making those bones stronger and denser.  Running does help with increases in BMD (bone mass density) but not at the same effective rate as jumping.  And by contrast, elite cyclists have been shown to be more susceptible to bone loss perhaps due to the lack of impact in combination with calcium loss when sweating profusely.  Considering both men and women begin losing bone density in their 40’s, it makes sense to encourage our kids (and ourselves!) to build up our BMD while we still can.   Increases Coordination Jumping rope increases coordination because it requires the brain to communicate the different muscle groups to work together just to complete one movement.  The arms have to swing the rope, and then then we must get the timing and rhythm to jump over the rope at precisely the right moment to successfully complete one movement.  We then have to link all of those movements together.  A 2015 study in the Journal of Sports Science and Medicine showed that 8 weeks of jumping rope enhanced balance and general motor coordination in pre-adolescent soccer players.         Have a Contest For our kids, who are still growing, we’re trying to get everyone to do 500 jump ropes in a day (100 at a time). It’s a low-cost fun way to get the heart beating, all the muscles moving and the kids laughing. Sometimes my kids compete with each other, other times they work on their personal bests, and still other days, we just turn on the music and jump.  We have a prize in our family for the most creative way to do 500 jump ropes.  The winner gets to do 100 jumping jacks! Look at #jumprope on TikTok. It’s amazing what some kids are doing with a simple rope.  

Share with us @tryverima or comment below how you are creating little pockets of breathing room in your life.   My children and husband have been home for 24 hours a day for the past 7 weeks since California re-entered the purple tier of this pandemic.  As much as I love them, and as much as I lament how quickly time passes and their childhoods are speeding by. . . it is a lot of time together.  And a lot of cries for “Mommy/Mom/Dawn” all.day.long.  Add to it a 13-year old whose bedtime has shifted to 10:30pm, and a 6-year old whose rise-time holds steady at 6:00am and that leaves precisely zero time for me-time.  Things are further complicated as a company founder where it is my own equity on the line and up to me to decide when the workday is done.  That nagging feeling of the work I put in never being enough, has at times become so overwhelming and I have spent many nights with my head swirling and heart pounding unable to capture much needed sleep.  Well, something has to change, so I decided to take a page from my friend Rochelle’s playbook and do what she calls “defensive calendaring” to re-establish some boundaries and claim some time for myself.  What’s more, I have started to “invite” my husband to my blocks of time so he knows that he is on duty and I am not available.  Here are some things I am trying that can hopefully inspire other moms.  And while they might not all qualify as “Me-time”, they do create small pockets of breathing room.    Getting Fit  Slowing Down the Decline A couple of weeks ago, I convinced my husband we had the space and the money to buy a treadmill which I would use fairly often as more than just a clothing rack.  I live in a gorgeous part of CA where the weather cooperates for outdoor activity 350 days of the year.  So why do I need a treadmill?  Because some days, I do not have the time to be physically gone from my house for an hour.  I do not have the bandwidth to plan my routes/walks, calculate distance, speed and track my progress.  The treadmill was my compromise so I could get my heart rate up and my endorphins flowing each morning.  Sometimes it’s a quick 15-minute jog while other times it’s a 45 minute *hike*.  And let’s not forget the 15-minute walk interrupted by 10-minute kiddo IT support, flanked by another 15-minute walk.  At least it’s more consistent and more overall minutes than the one hour once a week I was averaging.  (But seriously, do try to get outside as often as possible because there’s no replacement for fresh air and sunlight). The treadmill certainly takes up a sizable chunk of Bay Area real estate and the day it arrived, my husband turned to me and said, “Now you can get fit!”  Let’s get real here for a minute. This school year. . . . the year of the pandemic/homeschool/hybrid/shelter-at-home model, this mama is not getting fit.  I am merely trying to slow down the decline.  And for now, that will just have to do.  Create Art Take An Art Class A few of my friends came to the decision that 2021 was going to be a year of growth and exploration.  Sounds amazing in theory until one friend suggested we take a painting class together.  My stick-figure challenged self initially balked at the idea. . . . until I realized that it would be a chance to try something new, spend time with friends learning and growing together and there was zero pressure because no one (and I mean NO ONE) expects me to create anything remotely beautiful.  So we will make a night of it and for two hours on Friday I get time in my room, door closed, (Dad on dinner and bedtime duty) to learn, create and bond with my friends.  Ask For Help  Share The Emotional Labor Prior to establishing Verima, I was a full-time, stay-at-home mom and my husband was the breadwinner.  Our division of labor fell along stereotypical gender roles with my taking on all of the emotional and physical labor of our family’s needs.  Once Verima started taking up significant portions of my time, I learned to ask for help with the physical needs.  I asked my husband to pick up a child or pick-up the dinner I had ordered.  Well, I am happy to report that as Verima continues to grow, our relationship is evolving yet again.  I now ask that he share in the planning process and execution of our family’s needs.  In other words, share some of the emotional burden with me.  For example old-new me used to tell hubby that kiddo needs new glasses and ask him to take kiddo to the eye appointment.  But new-evolved me tells hubby that kiddo needs new glasses and then expects hubby to find the doctor that accepts our insurance, call the office, make an appointment and then take kiddo to the appointment.  I’ll definitely report back the day hubby is the one who notices kiddo needs new glasses.  I know it doesn’t seem like much, but asking your partner to do more than just errands really takes a huge load off.  I find that not having to think about what to eat for dinner actually frees up so much brain space for me and allows me a few precious uninterrupted hours of productivity.  Going Back to What I Enjoy Earlier, I talked about exploring new areas of interest with zero expectations, but I don’t want to forget to return to the things I enjoy.  I love teaching my adult students ballet at a small studio each week. Unfortunately, we had to cancel our annual spring and winter performances due to the pandemic.  As much as I love ballet and teaching, admittedly, when the studio owner approached me to choreograph a piece for a new Zoom performance, my first thought was, “With what time?!” But, it didn’t take long to remind myself that not only do I love to choreograph, set, and rehearse pieces, but I miss the entire process.  So, I agreed.  And now, each night when my brain is swirling with the hundreds of tasks to be done, I can turn them off, turn on Bach and let my brain interpret the music into dance. My dear friends.  It has been a crazy year and though we can now get glimpses of the light at the end of the tunnel, there are more months of the tunnel left.  Be gentle with yourselves and hopefully, you are somewhat inspired to make some small changes to make those months just a little bit better and a little bit easier.  Stay well.  Tag us @tryverima.com and tell us what suggestions work for you. 

Share with us @tryverima or comment below how you decided what worked best for your family.  I recently came across a 2014 study in the Journal of Labor Economics which concluded that there were long term (well into high school) positive effects on children’s educational outcomes in families where the mother stayed home with her children.  Top that with two studies from the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development and the Institute of Child Development of the University of Minnesota which clearly conclude that placing children in full-time daycare leads to higher levels of stress and aggression in these children.  My heart came to a screeching halt while my brain raced.  I quickly searched for studies to show the positive benefits of working moms on children and breathed a sigh of relief to find the 2015 Harvard study which found, “Women whose moms worked outside the home are more likely to have jobs themselves, are more likely to hold supervisory responsibility at those jobs, and earn higher wages than women whose mothers stayed home full time.“   Additionally, it seems men whose mothers worked also participated in more household duties and had a better division of labor at home as adults.    And so, typical of all parenting questions of the ages, the answer it seems is: There is no right answer.  I was a full-time stay at home mom for 11 years until I started Verima so the internal war rages on in me.  On the one hand, I have to believe that the years I spent at Gymboree, MyGym, music classes, the executive board of the PTA, the school library and serving as room parent had to have SOME benefit to my older children. . . . and yet paradoxically on the other hand, I have to also believe that my NOT doing it for my youngest does not detract from his well-being or education either.  I struggle daily with the balance of working on Verima and what I see as my duties towards my children and family.  When it’s your own company, there is always an endless amount of work to be done, and let’s not even start with the guilt regarding the endless amounts of work I *could* be doing to grow more/faster/better.  And all moms know the same holds absolutely true with children.  We are constantly left wondering should we be doing more? I could always cook more nutritious/balanced meals, get out and exercise with the kids more often or sit-down and catch-up/reinforce/get ahead in their school work.  The thing is, no one else is telling me I’m not doing enough.  There are no emails/phone calls coming from teachers to discuss behavioral issues or failing grades. There are no angry vendors chasing me down for unpaid invoices and there are no angry customer complaints.  At least that’s the case for today.  Trust me there have been days where my time is spent putting fires out all around me because kiddo didn’t hand in an assignment (or two), I didn’t print out the worksheets in time for Zoom math and Verima shipments didn’t make it to their destinations.  And I am keenly aware that my son’s autoimmune PANS/PANDAS can flare and take everything off the table in a blink.  But I take each week as it comes, and sometimes it’s each day or each hour as it comes, and thankfully only rarely is it each minute.  So really, the harshest critics are my own voices in my head questioning if I am making the right choices and if I am doing enough.  I suspect this is the case for the vast majority of us moms.  So for today, I will hush the critical voices in my head and remind myself that regardless of which set of advantages (stay at home mom or working mom) my children benefit from, they will benefit from a mom who loves them and is doing all she can to be her best self for them.  Tag us @tryverima.com and tell us what suggestions work for you. 

Share with us @tryverima or comment below how you supported your child through grief This past Friday, the world lost a beautiful soul.  Sue Mann was my daughter’s violin teacher and first introduced her to the violin at the tender age of 5 and gently guided her from “Twinkle Twinkle” to Bach’s Double Violin Concerto in D-Minor over the span of four years.  My daughter met every week one on one with Sue for her private lesson, and then spent her Saturday mornings playing with the entire strings ensemble Magical Strings West. The tight-knit group has played together in concert locally as well as internationally.  My daughter was aware that Sue was dealing with cancer and with as much information as I was given via her Caring Bridge site, I filled Vivienne in on updates throughout the year.  With the upheaval that ensued with the arrival of the pandemic, I suppose it didn’t seem to my 10-year old like such a great leap when Sue had to take a break from teaching.  Without a blip in the radar, my daughter uneventfully switched over to Zoom lessons with a substitute teacher, one of Sue’s colleagues.  The last update we got from Sue was that she was undergoing chemo and then hopefully, surgery.  She was ever the optimist with limitless inner strength and grit. I imagine the optimism in her posts is ultimately what left my daughter feeling blind-sided by her death.  There was no gradual letting go.  There was no saying goodbye.  She truly thought she would see her teacher again, until the day she learned Sue had died.  When I broke the news to her, she handled it very matter-of-factly.  She was more interested in the logistics of who would take over the music ensemble, who would be her violin teacher. She didn’t want to talk about it and she didn’t have any questions for me.  I reached out to May, the director of Social-Emotional-Learning at my children’s school and she explained an analogy to me like this:  “When kids eat an apple, they take many small bites, while attending to other things, and then return for another bite when they are ready for more. They will seem normal again and then think of something that might stir up more emotions. “   I took the advice to heart and didn’t push my daughter to talk and we had a fairly typical weekend.  Yesterday morning (five days later), we received the surprising news via email that her ballet teacher of the last two years (who my daughter sees five days a week usually for two hours at a time) had given notice and would be leaving in 9 days. The school had already hired her replacement. My daughter had just seen her teacher on Sunday for a private lesson, and there was no mention of her plans to leave the school. I understand it is up to each person (or sometimes the contract they are bound to) to decide how much to divulge, but at only a decade old, my daughter felt misled and once again blindsided.  After 20 minutes of stunned silence, she sat down at the breakfast table and just broke down in tears and quickly retreated to her room.   I quickly put food on the table for my sons and ran upstairs to find the floodgates had opened and her grief pouring out.  “Why are my teachers all leaving me?” She tearfully asked.  I tried to gently explain to her how life changes and as one thing ends, it makes room for new beauty to come into our lives.  Over the years, I have spoken with experts, read books, had many conversations with friends who have dealt (or more precisely are still dealing) with grief, and reflected on personal experience as a mother of three. Here is what I have learned works to help support children. I thought I would share them since this entire year has been filled with such heavy loss.  Allow Them to Grieve in Their Own Way I was heavily impacted by the news of Sue’s death and I couldn’t hold back the tears as I conveyed the news to my daughter.  Her response was so unemotional, I was left wondering if she cared! But, as I mentioned above, children take little bites that they can handle, and their grief looks very different from an adult’s.  The majority of the day, children may appear completely unaffected, but also expect that their feelings and behavior can and will turn on a dime in a myriad of directions.  Anger, fear, anxiety, sadness, etc. are all fair game.  And then, just as quickly, children will return to laughter.  Laughter and play are important *breaks* in grief for children, so do not misinterpret it as their not being impacted.  Let Them Say Goodbye and Give Them Choices As I wrote above, I think part of my daughter’s grief with Sue’s death was feeling that she never got to say goodbye.  I would have liked that too.  All mamas want to shield their children from pain and suffering, but in doing so, we may inadvertently send them the message that we don’t believe that they are strong enough to handle the situation.  Additionally, children may feel deceived or misled if we hide or sugar-coat the truth. Next Saturday is the Zoom memorial service for Sue, and some of the parents of Magical Strings are organizing a recording of the children playing a piece to accompaniment to edit together and show at the service.  I asked my daughter to run through the piece a few times to familiarize herself with the accompaniment before we recorded it at home, but she refused.  When we started to record, she played half-heartedly.  I stopped the session and reminded her this was a way to honor and remember her teacher, but if she did not want to participate, that was perfectly okay too.  I gave her the choice to participate or not. Though she didn’t answer me right then, but this morning I heard her practicing the piece on her own.  This past week, she has felt a lack of control in her life; a feeling that so much was happening around her and to her that she had no say in.  So, I am consciously giving her as many choices as possible.  I backtracked even further and gave her the choice whether to attend the service or not and also whether to participate or not.  And while her ballet teacher’s leaving does not have the same permanence, some moms at the ballet school have decided to compile a scrapbook where each child gets their own page to decorate, write, express feelings and in a way, say goodbye.  Answer Their Questions As Honestly As Possible This is a piece of parenting advice my friend Art gave to me over 10 years ago when my three-year-old asked me where babies come from.  And it’s the same advice I followed when our dear family friend was diagnosed and then died from brain cancer at just 10 years old, the same advice I followed when Daddy was hit by a car while bicycling, and the same advice I will continue to follow.  Of course, answers need to be age-appropriate as my then 3year-old was not asking for a biology lesson in human reproduction.  But I stuck to the basics and importantly, I used the correct anatomical vocabulary. Accurate vocabulary is true for all scenarios.  Using phrases like “lost my friend” or “passed away” can confuse young children and they need to understand the concreteness and finality of death to avoid confusion or more hurt.  This was not an easy blog to write, but I hope in some way it can help you and your child(ren) navigate grief.  Just try your best to give honest, thoughtful answers and remember, it’s ok if your answer is, “I don’t know. “  Show empathy, and give them a judgement-free safe place to express their feelings and thoughts.  And lastly, don’t be afraid to seek outside support/counseling if you feel you are in over your head.  Our children are resilient and strong and capable and with support and help from us, they will emerge stronger and wiser.  Tag us @tryverima.com and tell us what suggestions work for you. 

Share with us @tryverima or comment below how you manage to fit in true self-care!  Back in January, I penned a blog called “Creating Pockets of Breathing Room” to talk about minor changes I had made to try to maintain my sanity while raising three kids through the pandemic and growing Verima.  A friend, after reading the blog, wrote back, “Got to take an uninterrupted shower today!  #self-care “ Moms, I implore you. . . that is not self-care.  Self-care needs to have a set intention and purpose.  We need to be mindful of the fact that we ARE taking a break and our brains can actually let part of our day go, as opposed to rushing the entire shower so we don’t get caught with shampoo in our eyes when a child calls for our attention!  Sure, it’s a win when we do manage to complete the shower without incident, but let’s be clear, that is not self-care and we should not be telling others (especially other moms and our partners) that it is.  Otherwise, we run the risk of normalizing what should not be normal.   My husband loves tinkering with cars.  He enjoys working in the garage, adding after-market exhausts and gadgets to his cars and will happily spend a few hours adding these upgrades.  But, when he takes my mini-van to the station to fill the tires with air and the tank with gas, I would never insinuate that doing so counted as his self-care time.  Similarly, I enjoy baking and decorating the confections, but that does not mean cooking three meals to feed a hungry family every single day counts as self-care.  Again, it’s about the intention, and it’s about the purpose.  So, the purpose should be to set aside time to mindfully engage in something that fuels us whether mentally, emotionally, or physically.  And of course, this looks very different for each of us.  For me, it would be taking a ballet class, for others it may be going for a run (sprinting to pick up your kid from school doesn’t count!), getting a mani/pedi, or meeting up with dear friends.  Whatever it is, afterwards it should leave you feeling energized, fueled and more in touch with yourself and how you are feeling across the board.    Below is a *guide* (a bit tongue in cheek!) to help you on the path to finding true self-care.  If you are a foodie and enjoy trying new flavors: Scarfing down 4-day old cold pasta (which may suddenly be sporting new errr *flavors*), while standing at the counter is not self-care. Making a reservation at a place you’ve been meaning to try or at a favorite, tried-and-true restaurant and actually tasting your meal is.  If you enjoy shopping: Racing to the grocery store (even if it’s without kids!) while trying to figure out dinner ingredients and meals for the next couple days and dumping items in your cart so you’re not late for pick-up is not self care.  Taking an hour or two to visit your favorite shops to see what’s new is.  If you are a runner: Running around to get the unleashed dog back in the house, running up and down the stairs getting kids ready for school, running after a toddler who took off across the street, do not count as self-care.  A jog with a running partner, an interesting podcast or some fun tunes count.  If you enjoy cooking: Making a pot of Annie’s Mac and Cheese, reheating leftovers or constructing one ham, one turkey and one jelly sandwich (because goodness forbid they actually eat the same thing) in a race against time are not self-care. Picking out a new recipe, shopping for the finest ingredients and slowly simmering sauces is. If you enjoy reading: Checking over kid’s homework, reading the kid’s Weekly Reader, reading an instruction manual, and reading ingredient lists do not count as self-care.  Picking up a new title that interests you and engages your mind is.  And back to that hot shower: A shower is not self-care.  It’s a basic need that needs to be met.  Self-care would be luxuriating in the bath tub with some bubbles or a favorite bath bomb, listening to something soothing and allowing your mind to take a break from your stressors.  Are we getting the idea here ladies?  Choose the end result  you want/need after your self-care time (calm, focus, peace, energy, clarity, fitness, beauty, joy, etc.) and then make sure your self-care routine is a mindful practice that leaves you with that result.  And most importantly, actually schedule the time in the calendar!  Bring in any necessary reinforcements (partners, grandparents, babysitters, etc.) and truly engage in your self-care time.  Tag us @tryverima.com and share your self-care routine with us!

Share with us @tryverima or comment below the hidden costs you have encountered A couple of weeks ago, I finished filing my 2020 taxes for both my personal return as well as for Verima. As I carefully typed in each expense and deduction, my brain kept going to all the hidden costs that weren’t making it onto my worksheet.  The expenses both monetary and more abstract that I have paid in 2020.  The expenses that are unique to moms who are entrepreneurs.  I decided to share them here, so we could start a discussion on how we can do better.   Childcare When the start-up is not your own and one is collecting a paycheck for a specific scope of work, the math is easier. A typical workday (between 8-12 hours) yields either an hourly rate, or a percentage of salary, and at the end of the day (one hopes) once expenses for childcare have been paid, there is money left over at the end of the day.  But, when it’s is your own start-up, you have yet to collect a pay-check and the scope of work involves. . . . well, everything,  then how is it possible to calculate what one pays for in childcare?  I do not have a nanny, or a babysitter, or any extended family nearby.  And in this crazy year of pandemic home-school and 4x’s/day hybrid school drop-off/pick-ups, I really could have used one.  But, I struggled with how to justify the cost of paying for help when I have yet to bring in my own paycheck. However, all moms know, our days are easily fully consumed with getting meals on the table, kids to and from school, laundry, dishes, and school work done.  And this is the case even when kids are in school full-time!  And yet, if I don’t make the time to invest and attend to my business, it goes without saying that my business will never take off or be successful.  So my question is, where is the line for “childcare” as a business deduction for start-ups or entrepreneurs? I am aware of the child care tax credit, and this is great for working moms, but again, it requires “earned income” which means, as an entrepreneur/founder, I do not qualify.  Additionally, I love that there is a growing list of organizations that award grants for female entrepreneurs.  But you know what else we need besides extra dollars for marketing?  Extra dollars to off-set the cost of childcare.  Chores and Housekeeping My husband constantly reminds me that time is money, and that an hour of my time spent on Verima is worth far more than an hour spent on scrubbing toilets. . . except, someone still has to scrub the toilets.  I’m not talking *Martha Stewart clean*, fussing about specks of dust, or *improperly* folded laundry.  Oh no, I let that go a long time ago after the birth of my second child.  I’m talking, we need clean plates to eat off of and let’s make sure our bathrooms are not petri dishes of disease.  There is no guarantee that an hour of my time will bring in $x in revenue.  This is especially true in the beginning stages when founders pour in thousands of hours of labor before seeing a cent.  So, what formula do I use to determine exactly how much an hour of my time is really worth? And at what point do I say I can *afford* to outsource the cleaning and chores?  Time I think we can agree that time is the scarcest and most precious of all resources.  And as moms, we are all too aware of how quickly it passes when it comes to our growing children.  So let’s be real when we discuss the sacrifice of time a mother must make when choosing the life of an entrepreneur.  Similar to a new baby, a new company requires around-the-clock care, and “business hours” are not always adhered to as little fires need extinguishing evenings and weekends as well.   I try to always let my children know they are my top priority, and thus far I believe I have succeeded.  (All moms are very familiar with the “mom guilt” that creeps in regardless of how much we are doing for and with our children.  I can assure you, even when I was at home full-time, and room parent, and on the executive board of the PTA, I STILL wondered if I was doing enough). But boy does it sting when my calls run into the nights and I have to ask my 10-year old to read books and tuck her 6-year old brother into bed.    Additionally, I am a strong believer in being able to unplug and step away.  But truth be told, these days, I find it nearly impossible.  My three children are on spring break this week and it’s the perfect opportunity to spend quality time with them.  So I made a reservation at the San Francisco Zoo and took the morning off to take them.  We arrived and almost immediately my phone messages starting pinging.  My daughter literally took my face in her hands, turned it towards her, and told me she was confiscating my phone.  I mumbled some excuse about having to work and she firmly replied, “Not for the next two hours you don’t! “ I acknowledge that I require baby steps. . . and perhaps some intervention.  I promise, for the next two hours, the only reason the phone made an appearance was to snap pics and videos of the kids and animals.  But as I walked along, it also struck me that I don’t know when in the foreseeable future I will be able to take an actual vacation (as in multiple days) and unplug for the duration.  And quite frankly the idea of that saddens me.  I hope that day is in the near future and I will report back when I learn how to do it!    I won’t make a separate heading here, but for the record, we can throw nutritious meals out the door many nights too, because upon returning from the zoo, I ordered pizza for dinner and holed myself in my room for a 1.5 hour business call followed by another couple hours to finish working on this blog.  The only saving grace?  I love what I am trying to do with Verima.  I love talking to women, moms, customers and learning about them and what wellness means to them. I love hearing what works for them and exchanging ideas.  And I love being able to help moms get one step closer to feeling their best selves.  So, to all the moms out there, if you are contemplating your next business, it is imperative that it be in a field you are passionate about because the hidden costs are very real.  But if you are able to find that center of your Venn diagram where what you love, what you’re good at and what people will pay for, then it’s full steam ahead because your children will grow up seeing you model passion, grit, ambition and mad multi-tasking skills.  And hopefully, those will be enough to cover for all those hidden costs.  

Share with us @tryverima or comment below your best time-saving hacks!  Last week, I discussed the Hidden Costs of Start-ups for Moms, and came to the conclusion that the biggest cost that we have to pay dearly for is time.  At the risk of sounding cliché, it really is our most precious and finite resource.  So, it made sense to me that I share some of my favorite time saving hacks with the hopes that firstly, it will help some mama find even an extra few minutes in her day and secondly that you will share yours with me!!  LAUNDRY Years ago, I purchased two large wicker hampers, each one with two hanging laundry bags inside.  I placed these in a central location (In the kids’ bathroom or in the hallway) and that created four separate compartments for dirty laundry.  I then labeled each section with color squares, my personal sections are labeled: “Whites and Lights”, “Blacks and Darks”, “Red, Orange and Purple”, and “Blue and Green”. This was before my kids were reading, so they are perfectly capable of doing this from a very young age! First, I taught my kids that whenever they undressed, they had to turn every article (especially the socks!) right side out. This takes maybe a minute for each of them, but I explained to them that doing so saves ME 20 minutes of right-side-outing on wash day.  Then, they take their dirty laundry and color sort their own into the hamper sections.  After a few days when a certain colored bag gets full, that bag gets brought downstairs (currently by me) and put in the machine.  The plan of course is eventually as the kids get older, they will bring the full bag down and actually start the washing machine!    DISHES This one I adopted admittedly much later than I should have since young children are capable. But it definitely was a result of the copious amount of dishes home-schooling and working-from-home were dumping into the kitchen sink.  So, the old rule was that after every meal, each child brought their cups, utensils, and dishes from the table, and left them on the counter next to the sink.  I would then scrape, rinse and load the dishwasher.  However, the new system goes something like this: Every morning before breakfast, the children empty the dishwasher.  The youngest sorts and puts away the silverware/utensil caddies, the middle child stacks the bowls, plates, and cups into like piles and the oldest puts them into the cabinets. Then after each meal, each child takes their own kitchenware, scrapes leftovers into the compost bin, rinses the plate, and then loads it into the dishwasher.  It is so nice to come out of my office and not see a pile of dishes in the sink!  The same rule applies with lunch containers when my kids restarted eating lunch at school.  Pre-pandemic, they used to just leave the entire lunchbox next to the sink.  Now, they know to empty each container, rinse it out, and then load it into the dishwasher.  CUPS OMG, the cups. . . So many cups.  As we sheltered at home, . . . I said goodbye to the cups.  It occurred to me that each child already had their own unique/easily recognizable water bottle labeled with their own names, so why only use them for school?  So now, each morning everyone gets their own water bottle and that’s what they use all day. We do use glasses for beverages at dinner, but going from 20 glasses a day to 5 has certainly saved time and freed up precious top-rack real estate in the dishwasher!  ON-GOING SHOPPING LISTS I hung a magnetic pad of paper on the refrigerator door so as soon as we run out of anything, we can jot it down.  This has saved me time as well as freed up the brain space from not having to keep a mental list of things we’ve run out of each day.  This idea came courtesy of my kids telling me they were out of toothpaste.  Not low on toothpaste, but OUT. . . which then required an extra trip to the store to purchase toothpaste (because they all refuse the mint flavor that the adults in the family use). Now they know if they take the last tube of toothpaste, milk, apple, etc. they need to add it to the list.  Also, for myself when I think of something I just write it down straight away, and then I can let go of it.  Later, when it’s actually time to order/buy groceries, I’m not sitting there wondering what it was I remembered I needed yesterday.    SLOW-COOKER/PRESSURE COOKER/INSTANT POT A few years ago, convinced by my friend Divya’s rave reviews, I purchase an Instant-pot.  The entire box sat on my counter for about a month before I unpackaged it.  It then sat unboxed on my kitchen counter for another month before I actually turned it on.  Fast forward to now, when I use it about once a week.  On particularly busy days, I have go-to recipes that I can essentially just throw ingredients into the pot and come back to a delicious, hot, home-cooked meal.  Divya (my Instant-pot guru) sets hers the night before with steel-cut oats and her children have delicious hot oatmeal every morning.  I have no affiliation with the company and I am sure many companies make equal quality pots.  Some easy family favorites of my family are this carnitas recipe and this delicious bolognese!  The other hack for this is to double the recipe or at least make more than you need.  Especially for soups and sauces.  Anything that freezes well is golden because it just saved you even more time two weeks later when all you have to do is thaw and reheat!  Oh, and while I’m on meals, during the early days of the pandemic when days just blurred into each other, I started keeping a food log of sorts just to keep track of what we were eating each day because I honestly couldn’t remember if we had spaghetti for lunch that day or for dinner two weeks ago.  What I ended up with was a list of 25 or so meals that I knew my family would eat, including many that I had forgotten about and dusted off and revived.  Just having this list of go-to meals was a wonderful reminder of not only how much say red meat or veggies we were consuming, but also just having visual access of the list helped me answer the “what’s for dinner?!” question.  A quick glance at the log and I can easily spot we haven’t had roasted chicken in three weeks so let’s have that tonight.    “TO-DO BASKET” So, if your kids are anything like mine, their stuff ends up everywhere.  Legos, toys, art supplies, socks, Legos, books, did I mention Legos?  So instead of either running up and down the stairs all day every day (though I could use the cardio!) putting things away, or nagging three children all day every day about putting away their belongings, I put a basket at the base of the stairs.  Anything left out for more than a day ends up in the basket.  Then before Sunday dinner, they must go through the basket, and anything they still want must be put away in its proper place.  If not, whatever contents are still in the basket by Sunday night get donated.  This has reduced friction in many ways.  One, I am not constantly out-cluttered by toys on my desk, kitchen table, counters, and let’s face it, any horizontal surface.  Secondly, children understand they are responsible for their belongings. Thirdly, I can see what my children truly enjoy playing with and what they no longer need.  When I first implemented this system, I of course didn’t immediately follow through and donate their things, but I did put them away in my closet to see if/when they would miss their things.  More than once, they never asked for a hidden item again (then it really gets donated).  A few times, there was a child’s momentary panic, which then turned into a teachable moment of responsibility.  Plus when a child yells, “Mom, where is my _______?” I can always reply, “Did you check the basket?” I hope some of these have helped.  I know we could do an entire article just on time-saving recipes, which we might just do!  And, mind you, my children are not little soldiers and I still have my fair share of balled up socks, day-old lunch containers, and take-out pizza for dinner.  But, once implemented, these little things not only save valuable time but as I mentioned earlier, free up valuable brain space so we can focus on more important things like planning our next family vacation!  Stay safe moms and I would love to hear back with your time-saving hacks! 

Share with us @tryverima or comment below your favorite or best parenting tools I was recently sharing with a young mother how I used to handle toddler meltdowns and it occurred to me that while I have written previous blogs on parenting tools I like to employ, I haven’t consolidated them.  So, here are my top five.  My eldest is now a young teenager, so I am now navigating how to apply these to older children.  I would love to hear back from you about your favorite parenting strategies.  Say “YES!” One of the most useful pieces of parenting advice I got when my eldest was a toddler was from my good friend Art who suggested I try and make the answer “Yes, “ whenever possible. If he asked for ice cream 15 minutes before dinner, rather than, “No, you’ll spoil your dinner, “ the answer instead was, “Yes! That sounds like the perfect dessert for after dinner.  What flavor would you like?”    More than simply avoiding the meltdowns, this strategy helped my child feel heard and gave him a sense of ownership over how his day went. Simultaneously, it forced me to listen to my child’s request and evaluate what he was really asking. “Mommy, can we go to the park? “  My answer would be, “Yes, I want to spend time with you too, why don’t you help me with the chores so we can have fun together sooner than later?” Of course, there were hard “no’s” such as “No, you can’t hit your sister with a wooden spoon over the head,” and “I understand you are upset, but No, you may not be disrespectful towards others.”    The Power of “Yet” My children were extremely blessed to have the opportunity to attend Bing Nursery School which is part of the School of Humanities and Sciences at Stanford University.  Esteemed Stanford professor Carol Dweck’s work on Growth Mindset is pervasive in Bing’s philosophy and my children have benefited enormously.  According to Professor Dweck, a growth mindset means children believe that “intelligence can be developed through practice, learning, good mentorship from others. “  Professor Dweck discusses how children with a fixed mindset believe that “their basic talents and abilities are just these fixed traits.  They have a certain amount of intelligence or talent and that’s that.”  She then explains that the danger in this is “The wrong mindset, can make them afraid of challenges, afraid of effort, afraid of setbacks.“   At Bing, I observed my children’s skilled teachers masterfully engage with my frustrated then three year old using the power of “yet” to ensure that the task at hand was not simply something he couldn’t do, but rather something he wasn’t able to do. . . . yet.  I have taken this skill with me and use it to this day well into my eldest’s middle school years.     Last year he was introduced to solving for a variable in an equation.  He was frustrated and yelled, “I just can’t do it. “  I carefully replied back to him, “Of course you are having trouble doing it now.  You don’t have the skills to know how to do it YET. . . that’s why you go to school. . .  to learn how! “  It was important for me to further explain to him that once he became frustrated, his brain would actually block itself off from learning new concepts.  Once he understood that he wasn’t expected to already know how to do these math problems and that he was capable of learning how to solve them; this changed his entire mindset because he was given permission not to understand something, and given the confidence that he can learn it.  Of course, he needs constant reminders, but as a result, he is now open to new challenges and can embrace the frustration of a steep learning curve as a discovery opportunity.   Give Choices Children very often have their entire days dictated to them from what time they have to wake up (in time to get to daycare, school, mom to work, etc.) what they eat, when they eat, etc. down to what time they have to go to bed.  I try and give my kids as much choice as possible throughout their days.  Of course, it is all within a controlled environment.  I purchase all of their clothing, but they pick out what clothes they want to wear each day.  (Yes, even that pair of shorts that didn’t make it into the give-away bin that’s two sizes too small in the middle of January).  I stock the pantry and refrigerator with healthful snacks, they are free to pick out anything they want.  Here’s a list of outdoor activities we can do (hike, bike ride, rollerblade, pickleball, jump rope, etc.) what’s your choice for today?      By giving choices to our children, we are giving them some power over what happens in their lives.  Most parents know, that power struggles can get ugly so it’s helpful to give them power in age-appropriate ways.  When my children were younger, we would play games where they got to be the grown-up and tell me what to do.  Another favorite game of theirs was we would drag out a large bin of stuffed animals and I would say teasingly say, “Whatever you do, do NOT make a mess!” Which would be their cue to promptly grab and throw the stuffies all over the room creating a *huge* (but very easy and quick to clean-up) mess.  I’m still navigating how to give my teen more power and choice throughout his day.  I did find though that a good place to start was to empathize with the simple fact that, yes sometimes it really stinks to have to do everything you are told to do (by parents, teachers, coaches) all day long.  Which brings me to my next and perhaps most important tool: Empathize Many times our kids just want to be heard.  They want to express something to us and they want to be sure we understand how they are feeling.  Whether it’s a two-year old’s tantrum, a 13 year old’s melt-down or a 40 year old’s tirade, for the most part they are the result of our expectations not being met.  Simply letting your child know that you understand how frustrating/annoying/maddening/embarrassing/difficult whatever they are facing is for them, helps them feel heard and understood.  The important thing with with empathizing is that we are not changing the situation for them.  We are not solving the problem for them.  We are simply sitting quietly with them, acknowledging their feelings, allowing them to feel those feelings and understanding why those feelings are there.  When my six year old was sorely disappointed that his playdate had to cancel, I didn’t rush to make a new one, I didn’t plan something else in its place.  I just held him and let him know I understood how sad he was feeling that he would not get to see his friend that day.  And he felt a little bit better knowing that I understood how disappointed he felt.    “Earlier” Bedtimes While this strategy isn’t always feasible, I had to include it because it has given me some of my favorite and most precious times with my children.  None of my kids were great sleepers when they were young.  And even now, they still fight me about going to sleep.  But one thing I did notice is that they would get awfully chatty at night, talking about their day, telling me what was on their minds, what they were excited about.  And I loved hearing about it, but part of me would be trying to hush them because it was now an hour past their bedtimes and they had school in the morning.  So I started allotting time for what I call, “chit-chat and cuddles”. Some nights, I have whichever child’s turn it is that night, change into their pajamas and get ready for bed about 5 minutes early.  I also change into my pjs and we cuddle in bed and read a few bedtime stories.  Then it’s lights out and I actually let my kiddo just ramble on and on about whatever is on their mind.  This has helped us have some real bonding conversations, meaningful connections and given us insights into each other as people.  Sometimes, it winds itself down and my child will fall asleep peacefully, other times they require a gentle reminder that it really is time to stop talking and get some sleep.  But every time, my child feels loved, heard and connected.  I hope some of my tips can help you amazing mamas out there.  Let’s keep sharing and talking so we can start implementing strategies that work for us and help us be our best parenting selves. 

What do JK Rowling, Vera Wang, Martha Stewart, Kylie Jenner and Lady Gaga have in common? They’re some of the most successful female entrepreneurs on the planet. Oprah Winfrey, a female founder that needs no introduction, is one of the world’s biggest household brand names and runs a media empire that continues to grow. Whitney Herd, the founder and CEO of Bumble, recently became the world’s youngest female self-made billionaire when her company went public. Why Aren't Their More Female Founders? With women shattering glass ceilings around the world and across industries, why aren’t there more women going down an entrepreneurial route? What limits growth prospects for those who do? As an aspiring female founder, what can you do to build a successful brand and take your business to the next level? CLICK TO BECOME YOUR OWN BOSS TODAY Women-Led Startups Received Just 2.3% of VC Funding in 2020 An analysis of multiple female-founded businesses that don’t make it big shows that one of the most common problems faced includes a shortage of funding. The startup company aggregator platform ‘Crunchbase’ reports that while 40% of all entrepreneurs in the US are women, female-founded and mixed co-founded companies received only 9% of the total venture capital investment deployed last year! Other problems face by women entrepreneurs typically include fighting more biases or sexism at work as compared to their male counterparts, struggling with burnout due to multiple responsibilities including childcare, and having a lack of confidence in themselves. No matter your gender, age, geography or background, launching your own business is always a risky proposition, but it’s also one with the highest rewards. So, remember to keep these common pitfalls in mind and develop solutions for them from a short-term and a long-term perspective as you craft your growth strategies! As you take the plunge into launching your own business or expanding it to a new market, here are a few suggestions to help you on your journey. While some of these are useful pointers for anyone looking to build their business venture, some additional tips include guidance on specifically what to do as a female entrepreneur. 1 – Test your business idea quickly for viability In getting out to the market, speed is everything. You can spend months or even years refining your concept on paper, but the only way to truly know what works is by getting out there, testing your idea on-ground and receiving feedback from actual customers. A minimum viable product, or MVP, is a product with enough features to attract early-adopter customers and validate a product idea early in the product development cycle. Be confident, believe in what you’ve created, and go for it! CLICK TO BECOME YOUR OWN BOSS TODAY 2 – Keep an eye on the numbers and plan your funding well   Raising funds isn’t easy for any entrepreneur, but it is even more important as a woman to fundraise with determination. Whether you’re quitting your job to launch your own venture, or you’ve taken a break in your career and are getting back to work with your own firm, believe in your idea and do whatever it takes to get it off the ground, and manage your funds well. 3 – Be yourself If you know and believe in what you stand for, there is no reason not to back it with all you’ve got. This holds true even while you present yourself and your idea to the world – to potential investors, customers, business partners, vendors and even to employees. Own your identity and be yourself. 4 – Have a unique or clearly superior offering The best way to stand out in the marketplace is to by offering something no one else is, or by offering something that is so good that no one else can match it. Do your homework, position your product or service well, and you’re on the right track. This accelerate the time it takes to a product market fit for new venture.  5 – Iterate quickly and experiment often, with as little money as possible No business succeeds without continuous improvement in their offerings. While it’s important to keep the speed to launch in mind, its equally important to inculcate in your team a mindset of repeated iterations for continuous growth. 6 – You don’t have to go it alone - build a great team Many women choose to be the ‘lone shero’. However, the best businesses require the best teams. Invest in building a fantastic team – you never know who will help you elevate your business to the next level or where your next big idea will come from! 7 – Be smart enough to ask for help It is said that if you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room. So hire the smartest people, and truly listen to what they have to say. Reach out to the best mentors and ask them for advice. You’ll soon see the impact of this on yourself, and on your company. With these quick pointers, you’re ready to begin your journey! “With every experience, you are painting your own canvas, thought by thought, choice by choice.” Oprah                                                                                                                                                                                                    Tweet To quote Oprah, “With every experience, you are painting your own canvas, thought by thought, choice by choice.” As you empower yourselves on your respective journeys, don’t forget to show your support and solidarity for women everywhere! Raise your hand high to show you’re in, and that you commit to choose to challenge and call out inequality. How will you help forge a gender equal world? Celebrate women’s achievement. Raise awareness against bias. Take action for equality.

Share with us @tryverima or comment below your favorite Mother’s Day Gift you have ever given or received.   Last year Mother’s Day 2020, I wrote about what moms really want for Mother’s Day. . . and to think at that time, we honestly thought we had been in the pandemic for *so long*.  I still stand by all the points I mentioned, but this year got me thinking what are some practical ways families can celebrate Mother’s Day that fills mom’s bucket and leaves her feeling loved, appreciated and refreshed?  The 2020-21 school year highlighted just how much moms do, and just how much we rely on moms to fill in all the gaps when it comes to family and especially families with young children.  So, my approach is two pronged.  First, a list of ideas of things we can do to spend the day with Mom, without actually making more work for mom.  (So yes, a huge mess in the kitchen to scramble a couple eggs is not going to work unless there is a clean-up plan that follows it). Secondly, a few weeks ago we discussed time-saving hacks for busy moms, and fellow Verima moms and I discussed our favorite time saving gadgets.  So for those of you who want to give mom a gift she’ll actually appreciatively use (think less, “here’s a vacuum for you to clean with” and more, “here’s a vacuum that will clean for you”), I’ve attached a list of our Verima team’s favorites that buy us precious minutes throughout our week.  Take a Hike Plan the destination and have the kids lay out their things the night before.  Sunday morning, dad/partner and kids can pack up (or pick-up) a picnic lunch, and with no complaining, no lost shoes or hats, no asking mom where X is, we hop in the car and then go for a family hike.  The day is about mom, so be mindful of what she may like for lunch and take note whether she prefers beaches, mountains, rocks, or forests.  It’s a win win because the whole family spends time together, everyone gets some exercise and mom doesn’t have to cook or do dishes.  Plan a Bike Ride to a New Restaurant A few weeks ago, my husband found an outdoor restaurant garden that he thought we would like.  The entire family biked 7 beautiful winding miles there, enjoyed a delicious lunch and then biked the 7 miles home.  Everyone was tired (good tired!), fed and relaxed.  In fact the kids enjoyed it so much, we did the same ride again last week.  Bonus points because they now love riding their bikes to destinations so we get exercise and family time.   Create Art/Color Together I lack talent when it comes to drawing, painting, sculpting.  . . . but I enjoy it and I find it soothing. Problem is most moms don’t have the time to sit down and engage in it, and then we dread the clean up involved.  This doesn’t have to be fancy or complicated.  My kids love when I just sit next to them and color.  I have a friend that will buy a roll of craft paper, tape it to a wall in the kitchen and together draw, color and paint a mural together.  Buy a canvas paint hands and feet and make prints together. Write a Book Together For young children, you can interview them to have a keepsake memory of their answers.  What do you love about Mommy?  What is your favorite thing to do with Mommy?  What does Mommy do each day?  How does Mommy take care of you?  What would you do if you were a Mommy?  For older children, ask them to write about a day or moment that they remember being happy with mom or their favorite memory with Mom, and what was it about the moment that made it so special?  All children can then illustrate their books.  We will love spending that quiet time with our kids, while also gaining insight into what is important to them as well as taking a snapshot of what they are like at this specific moment in time.  That said, if you prefer, all of the above can be captured on video and edited together to make a sweet keepsake to watch.  Plant a Garden, Tree or Flowers Together This one is another gift that keeps on giving.  Family time spent outside, beautifying your home helping the planet and/or growing your own vegetables, flowers or herbs.  My children love our garden plot and will weed, water and pick with zero complaints.  And when they are done gardening, the will continue to happily dig and play in the dirt.  This way, each year you can see your tree grow/bear fruit and your flowers bloom.  I hope some of these ideas help you find a fun and bonding way to celebrate moms this year.  I especially love the last three since they can be done with grandmothers as well.  In fact, I think for my own mom, she would love a small letter from her adult daughter telling of a favorite memory with her either from my childhood or adulthood.  Or if you and the kids showed up at your mother-in-law’s with some pretty spring flowers and a few tools to plant them by the mailbox or front door.  And as promised, just in case you live too far from your mom or mother-in-law, or if your love language is gifts, here is our much awaited list of our favorite time saving gadgets.  I would love to hear back from you, the best Mother’s Day gift you’ve ever given or received.  Instant Pot Ultra 60 Ultra 6 Qt 10-in-1 Multi- Use (I just need the 6 quart but I know it comes in 8 Qt) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06Y1MP2PY/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_api_glt_fabc_7B80Y5RN2B2PHP1T65BG Roborock S6 Pure Robot Vacuum and Mop, Multi-Floor Mapping https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08BC1RJRV/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_api_glt_fabc_63SNXVVF48DDVAZTM9SR Cosori Air-Fryer COSORI 14-in-1 Smart Large Air Fryer Oven XL 7QT with 6 Accessories (there’s smaller versions … but I love to that the XL can fit a while chicken!) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08L39951F/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_api_glt_fabc_WT2CMQEDVDDM3CDQV0Y8 HomeSoap UV Sanitizer https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07Z9NZHBR/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_api_glt_fabc_Y6TPZ0725GYGSN0XRPJR Pasta Pot with Strainer Lid https://www.amazon.com/dp/B005PPP7MQ/ref=twister_B07WW2KDP2?_encoding=UTF8&th=1

They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but we’ve met someone who has forced us to reconsider this notion! Known affectionately by her friends as ‘the witch,’ makeup artist Elizabeth Mua is able to magically transform her client’s appearances.  A quick look at her Instagram page and you’ll need no more proof of her artistic gift. Combining this with her imagination and business acumen, this Miami-based professional has carved out a name for herself. We’re delighted to feature Elizabeth as we continue our series of articles on women entrepreneurs that captivate and inspire us. The Ingredients of Success As several veteran businesspeople like to point out, it is essential for entrepreneurs to know what drives them and what their purpose is. Without this clarity, many give up as their journey begins to go uphill. In Elizabeth we find not only infectious motivation, but also a great deal of bravery, self-reflection, and ambition. Elizabeth was driven to become a makeup artist by the possibility to create art on a canvas that is different each time. She even switched careers to set up her own venture. She tells us how scary it was, but also that not doing what she truly wanted to do was scarier – and we couldn’t agree more! Along her journey, she has constantly refined her skills, working with a variety of clients (Vanessa Oliveira De Sousa, Laura Chimaras) bringing to life the beautiful divas within them. She’s always pushing herself – ideating upon how to create different transformations, how to grow more, how to be different, and how to express herself in her authentic voice.    Another key ingredient for success that’s often overlooked is a healthy support system. Elizabeth’s blessed to have her mother, sister, and friends as her go-to cheerleaders and confidantes. The Turning Point As with several entrepreneurs and artists on their journeys, there’s often one pivotal project or client. This would be their ‘big break,’ if you will. For Elizabeth, this was a phone call for a makeup appointment for Willy Martin, and it changed the trajectory of her business forever. There’s been no turning back, and Elizabeth’s client roster today includes the likes of Camila Canabal, Laura Chimaras, Fefi, and La Chechi among many others. This inspiring artist has built her business with passion and persistence over six years. She’s diversified into other avenues with no small degree of success. Elizabeth conducts not only private makeup appointments, but also virtual and in-person makeup classes that are widely popular. A Quick Peek Behind the Scenes When we probed into her own daily routine, Elizabeth indulged us with some quick tips. She begins the day cleansing her face with a La Roche gel and a dab of Verima pain relief (she says she loves what it does to her face!). She follows this up with her essential sunscreen application. At night, Elizabeth uses a makeup eraser and micellar water, and repeats the same routine. She attributes her round-the-clock young and fresh look to products that are effective and are skin-, pet- and eco- friendly. Essential to ElizabethMua's Daily Routine She begins the day cleansing her face with a La Roche gel and a dab of Verima pain relief (she says she loves what it does to her face! Click Here to Purchase She won’t tell us everything though – her future goals for her business are a complete secret! On this note, we’d like to leave you with one of Elizabeth’s favorite quotes. We hope it encourages you on your own journey of creative exploration and entrepreneurial success. “Success is not final; failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts.” – Winston Churchill  

The Multitalented Diva If you’re familiar with American Spanish drama, the name Laura Chimaras is likely to ring a bell. This Venezuelan diva started acting when she was only eight years old and has grown ever since, not only as an actress, but also as an influencer, speaker, and writer. She embodies the essence of our series on inspiring women entrepreneurs.  Photo by Juan Hernandez Laura’s purpose, creativity and authentic expression resonate powerfully through all her work and inspire hundreds of thousands of people.In this feature, we continue unravelling the journeys of self-discovery and business expansion of fascinating women entrepreneurs around the world. We’re proud to cover Miss Chimaras as we explore the many facets of her diverse business ventures. Of death and re-birth The daughter of actor Yanis Chimaras, Laura rose as to stardom as a teenager as the protagonist of the RCTV produced drama Libres como el Viento. As the years went by, she acted in multiple novelas, movies, stage works and the television series Telemundo. During this journey, however, Laura went through a heart-breaking and life-altering event; she experienced her father’s murder in Venezuela at the tender age of 15. As you can imagine, this transformed Laura’s life at a fundamental level; she became deeply curious, disheartened, and insecure. In an attempt to find purpose and meaning, she emigrated to the United States, like so many others, to build a new life. Laura’s adventures have taken her through studies of Philosophy, Christianity and Religious Literature at Harvard. Her voice and expression in all her work over the past five years reverberate with a depth and personality that is rarely paralleled. This is captured perfectly in her motto:  "My protest bears knowledge as its insignia, firing words of wisdom at close range." Laura ChimarasTweet Shop Laura's Favorites Laura first tried the salve based on a recommendation from Elizabeth Lugo. The salve is used twice daily for skincare (face) prior to applying makeup and after makeup is removed. Shop Here Not for the faint hearted Deeply imbued with her search for purpose and the depths of human thought and emotion, Laura’s writing explores the various meanings of life, nuances of opportunity, and the interplay between order and chaos. As can be inferred, her creations are not for everyone, but precisely what set her apart as a person and as an entrepreneur. Those that do resonate with her work become ardent fans for life. Laura has authored five fiction books (originally in Spanish). These include her most popular book – Narcotic Passions, the Story of an Addict, Lost Words (My First Years in Letters), Never Lose Faith, and Setback: Memories, Time, Sequences. In her popular blog, Laura shares her musings on Liberty, Responsibility, Forgiveness and Love. Inspiring Women Entrepreneurs There are many who want to grow from all that life brings them, and to embody their lessons, journeys, and personalities in their creations and businesses. However, few are able to do so successfully. In Laura’s story, we see the spirit of an incredible entrepreneur. Today, in addition to being a television star and nuanced writer, Laura is a highly sought-after motivational speaker. Her upcoming conferences in Madrid and Tampa called ‘Hack your reality’ offer a powerful and widely popular two-hour immersion into one’s soul. She teaches attendees how to nourish their minds and how to discover the true essence of their being. You need to hear only a couple of testimonials to be left in no doubt about the life-transforming impact she has on people. Her clients have called her “inspiring, revitalizing and magical,” and a “source of truth, knowledge, and energy with a desire to help the world.”  Laura also conducts corporate talks. She teaches teams to work in synergy and shows corporations exactly how to motivate employees to exceed even their most ambitious goals. With a 1.1 Million+ Instagram following, this diva opines: “We want freedom, but we do not know the responsibility that this brings.” If these aren’t the words of a real entrepreneur at heart, we don’t know what are! “We want freedom, but we do not know the responsibility that this brings.” Laura Chimaras

Share with us @tryverima or comment below what savings choices you’re making for college and why.  This week, in continuing with our college for kids series, we are connecting with Dr. Grace Kim, DVM, AFC candidate about how to save and pay for higher education for our children!!  Grace is a busy mom of three children, wife, licensed veterinarian and now entrepreneur, having started Richer Life DVM to help people get their financial lives on track.  (Last week we kicked off our planning for college series with a blog and Clubhouse talk with Jean, who worked as an admissions officer at Princeton and Yale, and is currently working on the *other side* as a  college-admissions counselor at a prestigious high school in the Bay Area).   Grace wrote this informative blog about the basics of different college savings plan, and we will go more in depth this Wednesday, May 19 at 4:30pm Pacific on our live Clubhouse conversation.   Written By: Dr. Grace Kim, DVM, AFP candidate Updated May 2021 on Richer Life DVM Being in a profession that is no stranger to student debt, college savings became a priority when we were expecting our first child, as I think it should for many of those that expect their children to attend college.   First, let me hit you with some scary statistics.  Not for shock factor, but simply to let you know what the actual numbers look like right now in 2021 according to collegedata.com. Cost of college tuition and fees: Private colleges: $37,650/year Public college (in-state residents): $10,560/year Public college (out of state residents): $27,020/year Cost of room and board: Private colleges: $13,120/year Public colleges: $11,620/year Then there are other expenses, such as books/supplies,  transportation, and personal expenses.   As you can see, if you want to attend a four year college, the average price can range from approximately $20,000-$50,000 per year. Multiply these numbers by four, and that’s how much one can expect to pay for a four year college degree.  The estimated costs of attending the most expensive colleges in this country are $70,000+ per year. Compare this to the most recent United States median household income, which was $68,703.   Remember, we are talking about the cost of college NOW.  As you can guess, college tuition costs have far outstripped inflation and wages.  If you are expecting to have children or have young children at home, you can expect that these numbers will continue to rise.  I have absolutely no idea how this is sustainable, but this is the trend that’s happening right now. What if your little one decides that he/she wants to attend veterinary school?  Or any other postgraduate program of study?  Well, you’re looking at a lot more $$. How can anyone afford this?  Yes, there are those families who can actually pay out of pocket due to their high income status.  But for the vast majority of families, they will need to look at other sources.  Outside of family contributions, you are looking at two options: scholarships/grants and loans.  Yes, these will decrease the amount that you need to pay up front, but even if you were expected to pay just half of actual college expenses, you can imagine how burdensome this will be for many families.  I remember filling out the FAFSA form for college, not quite grasping the concept of how much all of this was going to cost.  I also remember the financial hardship that my parents experienced during my first semester.  I had younger siblings still living at home, and my family’s expected contribution was not in line with reality.  They did everything they could on their end by also taking out parent loans, and I did my part by working during school and over the summers to help defray costs.  I was completely on my own by the time I went to veterinary school, and all of this schooling resulted in six figure debt.  Having gone through this experience, I can confidently say that planning for educational expenses is always a good idea. Mr. RLDVM and I decided that once our children were born, we were going to start saving college ASAP.  We both saw the value of education and realize the sacrifices our respective parents made in order to provide us with our educational opportunities.  We are now in the position to do the same for our children, and due to our level of financial literacy and careful planning, we are on track to pay for college with less stress and anxiety. A QUICK NOTE BEFORE SAVING FOR COLLEGE Before diving headfirst into saving for college, look at your overall financial situation.  Namely, are you saving for retirement by maxing out your 401(k) (or equivalent retirement accounts) and contributing to your IRAs?  If you are not saving for retirement, then prioritize this first before saving for college.  Although not the ideal situation, there is always the option to take out loans for educational costs.  There is no such option for retirement. You can read about my reasons why I want you to start thinking about retirement NOW by clicking here.  I am pretty certain that your kids would rather take out student loans than stress about financially supporting you during your retirement.   Other financial obligations to consider is having an emergency fund (usually 3-6 months of expenses) and having a spending plan in place so that you can figure out how much you can actually set aside for college savings.  That being said, if you feel like you are ready to start saving for college, start ASAP.  The earlier you start this process, the more time you will have to see the beauty of compounding as you watch your account value grow over the years. THE 529 PLAN The most popular savings vehicle for college are 529 plans. These are tax-advantaged plans that you will typically see sponsored by states.  There are also some educational institutions that offer 529 plans. Why are they so popular? The reason they’re so popular is because the money that’s put into the plan grows tax-free, and you can take the money out tax-free. It’s basically a “retirement account” for college. There are 2 different categories of 529 plans. Pre-paid plan: Essentially, you pay for college up front in today’s dollars.  This is great from a financial standpoint because as mentioned beforehand, it’s almost guaranteed that tuition will continue to rise significantly.  However, you are usually tied to either one educational institution or a limited group of educational institutions. If you’re positive that your little one will attend State U and see no reason to attend any other college, you can consider this. Savings plan:  This is more commonly used compared to the pre-paid plan.  In this scenario, you are investing your money in mutual funds.  You are then free to use this money for any qualified educational expense, which currently includes college tuition, room and board, books and supplies, and computers. WHICH 529 PLAN? There are quite a number of 529 plans out there, so it will take some homework to figure out which one to sign up for. First, you’ll want to research the 529 plans that are available in your state.  This is because they may offer a tax deduction on your contributions.  Any way you can lower your taxes is always worth looking into. Next, you can start researching other state plans.  Yes, you can sign up for any 529 plan, regardless if you are an actual resident of that state.  When looking at plans, you will want to pay close attention to the types of investments they offer and their fees and expenses.  Types of investments: Many plans will offer age based options that will invest more heavily in stocks while the child is young, then will automatically switch over to more fixed income (bonds) investments as the child gets closer to college age. You can typically choose your level of risk (conservative, moderate, aggressive).  This is very similar to target retirement funds that will automatically change your asset allocation based on how close you’re getting to your retirement.  There will also be some static options that are not based on age for those that like to pick their own investments.   You should also check out the fund managers that are in charge of the underlying investments.  Seeing fund managers like Vanguard, Schwab, and Fidelity can give you piece of mind that the investments are being managed by reputable companies. Fees and expenses: Usually these fees include account management fees and the fees associated with the underlying investments (expense ratios).  The lower the number, the better. In a nutshell, if you are comfortable with their investment options and the expense ratios are relatively low, then you’ve found a good plan.   What about direct-sold 529’s versus advisor-sold 529’s?  If you are comfortable opening up an account on your own, direct-sold is the best way to go.  Advisor-sold 529’s rely on a broker, and you will be paying extra broker fees. The only situation where you should be getting an advisor-sold 529 is if you already have a financial advisor.  Just understand that you will be paying more for this option due to extra fees.  Even if you have a financial advisor, you can still absolutely go with direct-sold 529’s and set it up yourself.  Many 529 plans offer quite a bit of information on their website to help you get started. Lastly, compare your in-state plan(s) with out of state plans. Here is a good website to start your research. What if you get a great tax benefit from your in-state plan, but you like the investment options and lower fees of an out of state plan?  If you have the means to do so, you can sign up for more than one plan for the same beneficiary.  You will have to make some calculations to see if this works for you, but if the state plan has decent investment options and the fees/expenses aren’t excessive, fund the state plan just enough to get the tax benefit, then put the rest in the out of state plan. 529 PLANS- PROS As mentioned earlier, these plans grow tax free and you can withdraw the money tax free.  Your state plan may offer a tax deduction as well.   You can have more than one 529 account for the same beneficiary.  You just have to make sure that you don’t incur the gift tax if you contribute more than $15,000 annually (per individual, per beneficiary).   You can change the beneficiary to other family members.  If you have multiple children, this can be helpful as one child may need more money for college or postgraduate education than another.  Many plans have broad descriptions of “family member,” so you are not just limited to your immediate family members.  You can even use the 529 for yourself if you decide to go back to school.   There is no income cap, so wealthy families are certainly taking advantage of this option! The money is no longer restricted to just college.  The tax bill that was passed in December 2017 now allows money in a 529 plan to be used for K-12 private education (tuition only).  You will have to check with your individual plan to see if they will allow the funds to be used in this manner. 529 PLANS- CONS You can only use the money for qualified educational expenses (tuition, room and board, books and supplies, and student loans with a limit of $10k).  As of now, travel, transportation costs and health insurance are not considered qualified educational expenses.  You will still need to pay for college related costs, but it won’t be as massive as trying to also pay for tuition and room/board. If you have to withdraw money for other, non-educational purposes, you will be subject to a 10% penalty and and you will be taxed on any earnings.   Your child will possibly qualify for less financial aid. For me, the advantages far outweigh the disadvantages.  There is a reason that 529 plans are so popular, and hopefully more and more families will be encouraged to save for college using these plans. OTHER WAYS TO SAVE FOR COLLEGE Coverdell Educational Savings Account (ESA): Like 529 plans, Coverdell ESAs offer tax free growth and tax free withdrawals.  They also used to offer the advantage of covering K-12 educational expenses, but as mentioned earlier, Congress now allows 529 plans to also cover K-12 private education.  The biggest difference is that you are capped at contributing $2,000/year per child, whereas you can save significantly more in a 529 plan.  There is also an income cap; your eligibility to contribute to a Coverdell ESA starts phasing out if you have a modified adjusted income of $95,000 for single filers and $190,000 for married filers (tax year 2017).  UTMA (Uniform Transfer to Minors Act) and UGMA (Uniform Gift to Minors Act): These are considered custodial accounts.  Essentially, these are protected savings accounts for minors, so it is not limited to just educational expenses.  Little Junior will reach a certain age (depending on which state you live in- usually between the ages of 18-21) and will now have complete and total access to the funds in these custodial accounts.  You cannot tell Junior that he must spend this money on college tuition, or any other college related expenses for that matter. He has the freedom to spend the money however he’d like.  I think you’d have to have a very mature, trustworthy college aged kid to feel comfortable with this arrangement.  Some other negatives are that you must report income from this account on the child’s tax return, the accounts are non-transferable, and they will count against financial aid eligibility. Bottom line: If you are intent on saving for college, 529 plans offer the greatest benefits.  Coverdell ESA’s are also a good vehicle that you can use as long as you’re ok with the contribution cap and you are within income eligibility requirements. UTMA and UGMA custodial accounts have too many negatives when using them as strictly college savings accounts. Have you started saving for college? Did you find the process difficult? If you are currently using your 529 for your college aged child, please share your experience!

Share with us @tryverima or comment below how you are surviving the end of the school year!  Happy “Maycember” moms!  Moms with school-aged children fondly coined the term Maycember to reflect the craziness (similar to the holidays in December) the month brings.  From Teacher appreciation lunches, Mother’s Day, to end-of-year parties, recitals, performances, tournaments, team pizza parties, graduations. . . . etc, our calendars are packed.  For myself, add in the additional two children with May birthdays, and we have a perfect storm.  This past weekend as I was rubbing spices into the pork shoulder for the carnitas for my son’s birthday party burrito bar, my husband waltzed into the kitchen and simply asked, “Why are you doing this?”  The short answer of course was the fact that due to the pandemic and Maycembers past, my Kindergartener had not had an actual birthday party with friends and games since he turned one.  (yes, yes, cue the mommy-guilt. . . .that’s a whole separate blog!) And after the past year the kids just had, and with things starting to return to normal here in Northern CA, I decided to throw him a small backyard gathering with four of his buddies.  But, my husband’s question was not asking why I was giving him a party, but rather why did I put it upon myself to have a homemade burrito bar as opposed to ordering 2 cheese pizzas for delivery and calling it a day.  So, this started my wondering if us moms bring the craziness upon ourselves?    The easy answer is yes.  The cupcakes for the bake sale don’t have to be Pinterest worthy.  A box of Betty Crocker with some sprinkles on top will do the trick, as will a box of *gasp* already  made supermarket cupcakes.  Why do I care if my son’s socks match, and what IS this need I have to have all the laundry folded in a very specific way?!  The more complicated answer? My hormones made me do it.  I recently listened to Abigail Tucker, author of “Mom Genes” on a segment on NPR where she discusses the physical changes in the female brain that occur during pregnancy and after birth and the idea that mothers become, ”enthralled, in every sense of the word” with their babies, with a strong need to “do anything at all for your child, at every given moment.” So clearly, it’s not just me and I am in good company here.  But then, my question is how is it that some women are able to balance full-time demanding careers while meeting the needs and wants of their children and still get a full night’s sleep, while other moms (ahem. . . like me) are up until midnight baking those darn cupcakes?  What mental-flowchart can I run through my head so I don’t end up running myself ragged trying to see to every aspect of my children’s lives?  The best place to start would probably be to determine, is it a need or a want?  Obviously, I need to provide my children with healthy, nutritious meals.  I want it to look appetizing and taste delicious.  But does it need to be Instagram-worthy?  Nope.  The problem is though that this soon gets murky because where is the Joie de vie if we only do things out of necessity and not out of pleasure, beauty, or love?  I don’t think anyone would argue the merits of a beautifully prepared meal and the pleasure it brings to people even though they could meet all their nutritional needs with steamed brown rice, boiled chicken, and raw broccoli.  Another example is that I love the decorative pillows that adorn our beds.  They provide a pop of color, make the bed look inviting and luxurious while helping pull the look of the room together.  My husband and children however, find them annoying, taking up real estate and just another chore to take them off the bed to sleep and place them back on the bed each morning.  Clearly, those pillows are a want and not necessary. . . but if they bring me joy, then shouldn’t they remain? This brings me to another screening question I could possibly use which is to quote Marie Kondo, “Does it bring me joy?”  In the case of the pillows, they do bring me joy, so the pillows on my bed should remain.  However, since they do not bring my children joy, I should just stop wasting my energy, time and breath reminding them to make their beds “properly” pillows and all.  Last weekend, my daughter’s ballet school was recording each class’s dance piece to compile an end-of-year video in lieu of the spring recital.  My daughter is physically petite and her costume (borrowed from the school) was too long in the bodice and thus scrunching up at the waist causing folds of fabric.  Was it functional? Sure.  But did I take it upon myself to remove the tutu from the bodice, shorten the bodice, and reattach the tutu until 2:30am?  You bet I did.  Did the entire process bring me joy?  Believe it or not, it really did.  So moms, first we must decide of something is a need or a want.  And if it’s a want, then we need to determine if it brings us joy or not.  If baking those cupcakes for the bake sale brings you joy, then by all means bake away!!  But if it’s just stressing you out, then just buy some cupcakes, or donate the money.  Don’t give a second thought to judgement from others (it’s probably only in your head and if it’s not, who cares what those other moms think anyway. . . . unless those other judge-y moms are your friends, in which case you need new friends)!  It is also important to recognize that the “joy” we speak of is fluid!  So while baking those cupcakes on a lazy Sunday afternoon may bring you joy, baking them at 11:00pm on a Monday night may not.  In which case at that point, you give yourself an extra 15 minutes on Tuesday morning to pop into the Wholefoods and pick up a dozen cupcakes!  As for the burrito station at the birthday party?  It was a huge hit, the kids loved them, ate well and that brought me so much joy.  Please share your tips with me in the comments below, or by tagging us @trryverima, how you are keeping your mama bear/Mary Poppins/Martha Stewart complex in check!  

Share with us @tryverima or comment below your best summer safety tips! With the last couple days and weeks of school coming to an end (Congratulations Mamas, we made it!!), summer plans are looking to remain on target thanks to mass vaccination and lowered transmission rates.  But many of us are going through our awkward re-introduction to society phase, and with it comes remembering some summer safety tips that perhaps just were not on our radar last summer.  While this is not a comprehensive list by far, I am simply highlighting a few that are at the forefront of my mind whether it be due to my local news or the age of my children.  Beaches, Riptides and Sneaker Waves I live in Northern California where the Bay Area is notorious for its unpredictable waves.  Over the pandemic, I took my family out to hike and explore several beaches including Big Sur, Half-Moon Bay and Santa Cruz.  What I didn’t realize is that this past year alone, there have been 12 fatalities in the Bay Area from unsuspecting people getting swept up in a wave.  Just a few months ago, my moms group was seeking drones equipped with cameras as a family desperately searched for their 12 year old son who was swept to sea.  And it’s not just CA.  With Hawaii once again teeming with tourists who may be lulled into a false sense of security by the crystal blue waters, always respect the ocean and the tremendous power it wields.  Some things to keep in mind: NEVER turn your back on the ocean.  This is important to teach our children as well.  I know, it’s hard and little children will inevitably break this rule which is why: Have small children wear life jackets even when just playing in the sand.  This article discusses US Coastguard-approved jackets and if you’re not a strong swimmer, you may want to consider one for yourself.  Watch this video on how to spot riptides, and familiarize yourself and your family with what to do if caught in one.  While we might imagine lazy days at the beach burying our heads in a juicy novel, make sure you clearly communicate with other adults exactly who is watching the children.  Swimsuit Colors I recently came across this article on lifehacker.com which tested out the visibility of different color swimsuits in pools and lakes.  As a mom, my top criteria for swimsuits was sun-protection, utility and comfort.  Admittedly after that I considered aesthetics and it didn’t occur to me that the color of the swimsuits could effect safety.  Certain colors (light blue and white) all but disappear under water, while neon pink and neon/bright orange remain the most visible.  The articles makes note that, “Trained lifeguards will obviously be looking out for much more than swimsuits in varying colors and shades, but particularly for the untrained eye, a brighter colored suit may help you more quickly spot a child who has fallen into the water or notice they’ve been under longer than they should be. “ Just a moment while I go order brand new swimsuits for the fam. . . . Teens and Driving Without exaggeration, my newly minted 14 year old just last year hit the 4’9” height recommendation that got him out of a booster seat.  So when my youngest child pointed out that next year his big brother could begin to learn how to drive, I was startled to say the least.  AAA examined the data from 2008-2018 and not surprisingly, the summer months of June, July and August tend to have the highest levels of teen driving accidents.  The most common cause of accidents include speeding, drinking and distractions (phones, friends, etc.) so it is important that we not only reiterate these points with our teens, but model them as well!  My children have called me out when I *may* have been driving a bit too fast, or glanced a text message coming through.  It is important for them to realize that the “glimpse” could make all the difference in the world, so I promise to do better myself, for the sake of my children.  That said, while telling kids NOT to do something is important, it is equally important to have a plan B to safely get out of a situation when they DO it regardless.  Some families I know use codewords to help kids get out of uncomfortable situations.  A child can text, “x” to a parent and the parent will take that cue to either call or text telling the child that s/he needs to come home asap thus giving him/her an excuse to leave an uncomfortable environment.  Also, if your child has been drinking, hopefully they know that they can text/call you or another trusted adult for a ride at anytime.  It’s definitely worth it to have that open conversation with some trusted adults in your child’s life so we known they will always have a safe place to turn.  Image from Naviaux Labs UCSD Ticks and Lyme Disease This one may seem random, but the universe is telling me to include it.  As many of you know, my son has PANS/PANDAS and his is triggered by the strep bacteria.  But a great many PANS children are triggered by Lyme disease and recently a friend’s child was diagnosed with Lyme after months on fatigue, brain fog, joint pain and anxiety.  That night, I watched Netflix’s documentary on Amy Tan and her struggle with Lyme, only to learn that other celebrities such as Amy Schumer, Just Bieber, Alec Baldwin and Bella Hadid have all spoken openly about their Lyme diagnosis.  And just to nail the point home, the very next morning, as I sat to write this blog, I found a TICK crawling up my bedroom wall right in front of my desk!  So consider this my PSA: CHECK YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY (furry four-legged ones too!) HEAD TO TOE for ticks after spending a day outside in grass or in the woods.  I know my family has definitely spent more days hiking through the pandemic, so do not forget this crucial step at the end of the day.  This comprehensive guide is an important read especially considering that according to the CDC, 476,000 Americans are diagnosed and/or treated for Lyme each year.  While this number may be higher than the actual number of infections each year (as many are treated prophylactically to avoid Lyme infection) it is still a large number that warrants caution on our part as parents.  And to my California peeps. . . yes, unfortunately Lyme is on the rise even here in CA, so for peace of mind, just do a quick check.  As I mentioned earlier, this is by far a comprehensive list.  Just some things that have come up on my radar recently.  And while by no means is this meant to strike fear in anyone, I hope it just puts things on your radar so you and your family can enjoy a safe and happy summer!  Share with us @tryverima or comment below your most trusted summer safety tip! 

  The Trend-Setting Visionary “Some people want it to happen, some people wish it would happen, others make it happen.” – Michael Jordan   Have you ever looked at a food item in a grocery store and pondered upon the supply chain systems and processes that helped bring it there? If you have, you have something in common with another such observant and curious woman, Jan Risi. Recently named to the restaurant industry’s power list, Jan’s been called “the strongest link in the (foodservice) supply chain” by the Miami Herald. She’s highly endorsed as a leader, team builder and strategic planner by her colleagues. She’s currently juggling roles as a member on several boards. She’s the founder and CEO of a food cooperative powerhouse that manages billions of dollars and tens of thousands of franchises globally. She’s set trends, reconfigured business models and made a lasting mark on the F&B and hospitality industry. In this feature, we’re delighted to dive into Jan’s inspiring story, and to present to you invaluable entrepreneurial and leadership lessons from this fascinating visionary. A Strong Foundation Aristotle once said, “well begun is half done.” Jan graduated from DePauw university with a double major in English and economics. The best entrepreneurs and leaders believe in getting their hands dirty and working from the ground up, and it was the same with Jan. She began her career with Ralston Purina (now a part of Nestle), working in a plant where animal feed was manufactured. Tasked with procuring ingredients, Jan worked with and learnt from the cowboys and farmers of Texas. She’s cited this to be “the best training in the world” as it allowed her to understand the supply chain. It’s often easy to overlook the importance of a robust career foundation; Jan invested in one and went on to cement her experience at other restaurants including Burger King, Chef America and Jack in the Box. Today, she’s rightfully an acclaimed alum and has won notable awards from her university for Excellence in Entrepreneurship and Alumni Achievement.   Lessons in Leadership from Top Women Entrepreneurs About 24 years ago, Jan founded the Subway ‘Independent Purchasing Cooperative’ (IPC), a Miami-based cooperative along with Subway founder Fred DeLuca. IPC helps more than 30,000 Subway franchise owners and operators globally by managing almost $5 billion in food, packaging and supplies, negotiation costs and helping them improve quality. What does the leader at the helm of this enterprise cite as the reason of her success? Echoing the words of Steve Jobs, Jan says she’s so successful today because she makes it a point to hire people smarter than her. Ask her senior executives and they’ll say she truly encourages and empowers them to do their best work. There’s a lot to learn about leadership from Jan, the most inspiring takeaway being the care with which she gets to know her employees’ families, spends time with new recruits and hosts holiday parties to celebrate with her team. An advocate of a well-rounded life, Jan personally gifts her employees’ children, to make them feel like a part of the company’s growth. We sometimes forget that the reason so many of our employees and colleagues shine at work the way they do is because their children, spouses and parents are supporting them. Jan never forgets! Visionary, Advisor, Hustler Executive, entrepreneur, President, CEO… and Jan’s doing much more! She’s advising four boards, empowering them with her vision and experience in foodservice, hospitality and supply chain management. The first board is Florida House on Capitol Hill, a state embassy that promotes Florida to the world. The second is Coral Gables Trust Company, a wealth management and financial planning firm, which is the largest privately held trust company in South Florida. The third is the James Beard Foundation, an organization that celebrates chefs shaping the future of America’s food culture. Besides these organizations, Jan advises the restaurant chain DogHaus, which has a cult following across America for its signature all-beef ‘Haus Dogs,’ handmade ‘Haus Sausages’ and burgers. And lastly, Jan sits on Subway’s strategic planning council and has advised the food behemoth in its 5X growth over the past two decades. So how do we sum up Jan’s enthralling story? Four words. She hustled. She conquered!